I lost you. I don’t know how it happened, and I am not sure how to get you back. My days are harder now that you are gone. Quieter – in that ’empty quiet’ kind of way. This is the worst kind of ending, abrupt and unexpected, where everything reminds me of you… even the song on the radio…right…now. I have been through this before. Haven’t we all? That agonizing heartbreak period when you swear not to put yourself through such disappointment again. Yet, here we are. I never expected us to end up apart.
If you’re with someone else tonight and all of sudden miss my touch… please come home. This time, things will be different. I won’t demand that you entertain my every whim without appreciating how valuable you are. No more abandoning you when you feel rundown and need me most… you’ve never done that to me. Darling, you have been some of the best company I’ve had in years. This time around, I promise to give you only the best of what I have.
The thing is, I think anyone would agree that we have worked well together these last few years. We’ve traveled the world extensively without one moment of tension- that is so rare! Your willingness to back me up, no matter where we were or what the situation may have been, staggers me. I know you probably felt disregarded when I got busy, or when friends came around… please know that at the end of the night, it was always you.
Just because I couldn’t hold onto you forever doesn’t change how you have shaped me. I still remember that rainy night in Florida when I held you, tears spilling from my face onto yours, while you quietly sang me an acoustic version of Griffin House’s “Only Love Remains”. Only the two of us could hear, and in that private moment, I realized with unshakeable certainty that as long as you were around, I’d be okay.
I know that my blog is relatively new and my readership is painfully limited at this time, so you may never know how much I loved you. I suppose I write this more for me than for you.
Nevertheless, if somehow, in some way, my message finds you, please know that I would do great things to have you close to me now.
Moment of silence for you, my beloved iPod. Though I may find another down the road, you could never truly be replaced.